Things Beyond Our Control

"Everybody talks about the weather but nobody does anything about it" is attributed to Mark Twain. I thought about this on Sunday after so many churches cancelled services due to icy road conditions in our area. I'd much rather have delivered the sermon I labored on last week, but I suppose it will keep another week. I may even have some better insight after thinking about it a few more days.

The weather is one thing beyond the control of us mere mortals. And there are others.

One is the false assumptions people make.  

I was a hotel desk clerk many years ago when a traveler began to scream at me: "I have a confirmation number! It's right here." He never did understand that his confirmation was for the following night and we were currently full. He insisted on calling the manager at home who instructed me to release one of the rooms we had reserved for a later traveler who had the correct date on his confirmation.

We all struggle with false assumptions when we leap to conclusions that aren't correct. I've learned I can't control another's false assumptions, but I can control my own.

And it’s beyond my control to force a student to succeed. Every semester I see young people who begin well and then lose interest in their studies. I try to cajole them and to encourage them but it boils down to personal motivation. This is why I’ve found adult returning students are often the best students. They’re motivated, knowing this may be their last chance to get an education, and most likely they’re paying tuition themselves!

A pastor friend worried quite a bit about the declining Sunday night worship attendance in his church. He tried to shame his members and tried a number of other innovations to no avail. Finally he came to terms with this being something outside his control. He began to quote Yogi Berra: "If they ain't comin', you can't stop 'em."

And I'm burdened about people who have such potential for God's kingdom, but who live beneath their privilege. I see so many with energy and gifts and insights, but who don't seem to value their spiritual lives. But I have no control over this. Following Christ is a decision one must make for himself or herself. No one can ever be bullied or nagged into the fold.

Jesus met a person like this. "You are not far from the kingdom of God," he said (Mark12:34). We don't know whether this young man ever found his way to the kingdom.

Can anything be sadder than coming so close, yet falling short in the quest for spiritual significance?

The What If's Of Life

We'll soon hear about the new president's "first 100 days." Writer Thurston Clarke published a history in 2013 not of the president’s first 100 days, but of his last 100 days. The president is John Kennedy and the book documents what JFK was doing day-by-day before the tragedy of Dallas.

Clarke pulled together narratives from many sources and many cities.

The reader feels a sense of dread as the days tick by and Nov. 22 approaches.

An intriguing aspect of this book is the initiatives Kennedy began that he wasn’t able to complete.

He ordered the removal of 1000 American advisors from Vietnam by December, making clear he saw the war as unwinnable and planning to remove all U.S. troops before the war escalated. He also made secret overtures to Fidel Castro in Cuba, promising better relations if Castro would cease exporting soldiers to other Latin American nations.

JFK intended to seek an opening to China as well, many years before President Nixon’s historic trip. Kennedy pushed a tax cut bill that he believed would promote greater prosperity in the nation. He also took new interest in the plight of Soviet Jews and promised to do what he could to help them gain greater freedom.

And on a more personal note, the death of their newborn son, Patrick, brought the Kennedys to a new closeness in their marriage.

We can only imagine the “what if’s” had not the assassination taken place in November.

I’m convinced many of us are tormented with “what if’s” in our lives. “What if I’d gone to the doctor sooner?” or “What if I’d not driven that route that day?” or “What if I’d been morally stronger?”

Alas, the “what if’s” plague us, but there’s nothing we can do to alter the course of the past. No one of us, no matter how strong, is strong enough to pull back the hands of a clock.

This is why St. Paul’s word in Philippians 3 has always been one of my favorite texts in the season of New Year. “Forgetting those things which are before, I press toward the mark of the high calling of Christ,” he wrote (Phil. 3: 13-14).

We do learn from the past, to be sure, but Paul’s word is to forget the failings that discourage us and to infuse our lives with a new and greater purpose. The message of the Christian gospel is that there need not be any “has-beens” in God’s kingdom.

He is a God of mercy who specializes in restoring his wayward people from their failures and dashed hopes.

And he promises to be our partner in building a meaningful life of service to God and others.

On Making Peace

Someone had an interesting post on Facebook asking for sad personal stories in three words. A few responders used levity with "Donald Trump won" and "President Hillary Clinton." But other responders were gravely serious: "Nobody likes me," "children are hungry," "you have cancer" and "husband in heaven."

Our world is filled with turmoil and the holiday season accentuates the unrest so many people know.

How strange the words of the prophet Isaiah fall on our ears: the Messiah will be the prince of peace (Isaiah 9:6).

The Peace Pledge Union in the UK states we've had 250 wars since the end of World War II resulting in 50 million casualties. Our world will know "wars and rumors of wars" until God inaugurates the millennium.

But the Christ of Christmas promises peace in our hearts. He does this in two ways. First, he pays our sin debt and removes our estrangement from God. The apostle Paul wrote, "Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ" (Romans 5:1). And second, he gives us the gift of the Holy Spirit. Jesus said the Holy Spirit would be and do something that Christ in the flesh couldn't do: he would be "with" us and "in" us forever (John 15:17). It is the Holy Spirit who gives inner peace in a world of turmoil.

After we receive the gift of peace, we're exhorted to give ourselves to the noble task of peace-making. As St. Francis wrote so long ago, "Lord, make me an instrument of thy peace."

It was the greatest gamble of the Carter presidency when the president invited Menachem Begin of Israel and Anwar Sadat of Egypt to Camp David in 1977. The peace summit was fraught with difficulty and the president already had a statement prepared announcing the dissolution of peace talks had that been necessary. And on day 11, Sadat was packing to leave when Carter persuaded him to stay longer. The Camp David Peace Accords were reached on day 13.

The men returned to a joint session of Congress where President Carter quoted the prince of peace: "Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the children of God" (Matthew 5:9).

President Sadat visited a new American president four years later, then took time to travel to Plains, Ga. to visit his old friend Jimmy Carter. The natives still remember "Sadat Day" on Aug. 9, 1981. Eight weeks later President Sadat was assassinated in Egypt by terrorists who disagreed with the Camp David Accords. He was only 62. But Sadat left behind a legacy of peace.

We are never so much like Christ as when we become peace-makers.

Christmas: Time of God's Open House

The prison warden circulated a note to inmates asking for suggestions on the kind of party they'd recommend for his 25th anniversary. The prisoners all had the same idea: open house!

 Christmas is the season when many people have “open house” parties. But “open house” is misnamed, isn’t it? When you plan an open house, do you invite everyone? I rather doubt it. We must be exclusive, for there isn’t enough food, or space or time to invite everyone. Some folks by necessity get left out

This is the way much of life is. Travel on an airplane is exclusive: one must purchase a ticket, come to the airport at the appointed hour and pass through security. College enrollment is exclusive: one must score well on the ACT or GRE, be accepted and pay tuition. Marriage is exclusive: one must find a willing mate, take a blood test, buy a license and locate an officiate. 

And sadly, some organizations are exclusive. Only certain kinds of people are welcomed. We build walls separating us from others and erect signs reading “Members Only” or “No Trespassing.”   

However, on the first Christmas in Bethlehem, the Creator God sponsored a non-exclusive open house. The invitation went out to everybody. Note the message given the shepherds: “Fear not: for, behold, I bring you good tidings of great joy which shall be to ALL people” (Luke 2:10, emphasis added).

It's significant that these shepherds received an angelic invitation. They were unclean men, both physically and religiously. Their work precluded matters of social decorum and religious ritual. The Old Testament law specified they would be unwelcome in the temple, and they probably were unwelcome at an inn. But they found welcome with a Nazarene family in a stable.

On the other side of the social spectrum were the wise men whose invitation was sealed with a star. They were intelligent, revered and probably wealthy. They, too, found a warm welcome at Bethlehem’s stable--not because of their bank account, but because they humbled themselves before the newborn king.

There were no walls, no barriers and no “members only” signs at the manger.

Later Jesus himself said, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Here I am! I stand as the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in and eat with him, and he with me” (Matthew 11:28, Revelation 3:20).

To a world of exclusion where petty men build walls of restriction, the message of Christmas comes: salvation is available to all people. God is throwing a party, and everybody’s welcomed.

The Season of Giving

Educators are warned about taking gifts from students, but I did get an interesting e-mail this week from a student, coincidentally just a few days before her final exam in speech class. She wrote, "I am planning on making some holiday treats for my teachers and wanted to know if you were allergic to anything or prefer something without chocolate."

I responded, "I am allergic to aspirin, so don't use that. And chocolate is a gift from God."

Gifts are a significant part of the Christmas season. I remember last year standing and talking with the convenience store clerk near our house. She told me another customer had been by and gave her $100 as a tip. I stood there rather sheepishly wondering if she wanted the same from me! But we do normally think of people at Christmas we might not think of at other times, such as the mail carrier or hairdresser or the like.

Giving is a significant part of the original and biblical Christmas. Even the smallest child can recite John 3:16: "For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son . . ."

We were born into the world in order to live and hopefully make a contribution. Jesus was born to teach us about God and show us how to live, to be sure, but he was also born to die. John said in the Revelation that he "was slain from the foundation of the world" (13:8). This means that in eternity past God the father understood what he must do to effect our salvation, and the awesome price required.

The shadow of the cross was over Jesus even in Bethlehem. The baby was wrapped in swaddling clothes, very similar to the grave clothes used in that day to bury the dead. Surely the magi had another use in mind, but one of the common uses of myrrh was to embalm the dead.

The artist Holman Hunt is perhaps best known for his painting of Jesus holding a lantern and knocking on a door. But he painted another scene in 1873. The lad Jesus was wearied from working in Joseph's carpenter shop, and he went to the door to stretch his muscles. The setting sun facing him cast a shadow of a cross on the wall behind him. Mary in the background saw the image and froze in terror, recalling the prophecy shared with her about her son's future.

When we consider the depth of God's love for us at Christmastime, it makes any sacrifice in serving him on our part seem so trivial. As Isaac Watts wrote, "Love so amazing, so divine, demands my life, my soul, my all."

Christmas . . . Again?

The Christmas season has returned, and for those of us in the church, we'll hear the same stories all over again. We've heard them since we were children and most of us know the stories by heart. Pity your poor pastor who must find something new to say though he's been preaching these same stories for 20 years!

But there's nothing wrong with familiar words.

Someone proposed a list of the five sweetest phrases in the English language:

 1. Sleep 'til noon.

2. Here's that $20 I owe you.

3. Paid in full.

4. All is forgiven.

5. I love you.

We've heard these before, but we never tire of hearing them again!

One of my seminary profs, Dr. Henley Barnett, took issue with the phrase, "back to the Bible." He insisted the Bible wasn't behind us. It's way out in front of us, he said, and we've not caught up with it yet. I think he was correct.

The familiar stories of Christmas yet speak to our need to press on in Christian maturity.

The angel told Mary that though she'd never been with a man, she would bear God's child. The Holy Spirit would accomplish this. So Mary gave her body to the Holy Spirit. Paul insisted that we must do this, too, since our bodies belong to God (1 Corinthians 6:19). Every Christian needs to grow in personal holiness.

The angel told Joseph that he mustn't break off with Mary, but remain and be a father to Jesus. Joseph determined to face the disbelief and scorn of his countrymen and fulfill this role. He was committed to God despite opposition. Modern believers can profit from his example.

The angels told the shepherds about Jesus. Though they were of a lower caste than the general citizenry, the shepherds came boldly to worship Jesus. They demonstrate that all us sinners can come to Jesus despite the categories society arbitrates, and that no one should look down on others in God's kingdom.

And the educated and wealthy wise men came to worship Jesus, giving him costly gifts. So we must give our gifts to him for it more blessed to give than to receive. The church receives the gifts of her members and uses them to honor God.

A few years ago a Christian university president resigned amid charges of financial malfeasance. These charges included private jets, lavish vacations, cars and clothes. But for every abuse of God's money there are 10,000 stories of churches using God's money to teach the Bible, support missionaries and help people in need.

 Are we there yet? Not hardly! The familiar stories of Christmas yet summon us forward in obedience to Christ.

Do-It-Yourself Religion

I always put a good coat of wax on our cars before winter sets in, and the SUV we traded for in August was next in line. But, I reasoned, the SUV is larger than my vehicle that I'd already done and waxing would take longer and be harder to do. I toyed with the idea of hiring this done and visited the webpage of a nearby auto detail store. When I saw a paste wax job was $150, I decided differently. As a former colleague once told me, "I’m the cheapest labor there is!"

So, the job is done and the vehicle's ready for winter. And I enjoyed seeing it sparkle in the sunlight today. That's about all I get out of this deal since it's the wife's car. As I often tell people I get it when it's dirty or needs gas.

A lot of folks are do-it-yourself-ers these days with the cost of labor so high. But in the spiritual realm we can't think we'll save money, time or effort in getting right with God.

John Wesley tried. He was raised in a decidedly Christian home. His mother, Suzanna, was truly a saint who taught her children to love God. Wesley attended Oxford where he and a few friends were so methodical in spiritual practice that they earned the name "Methodists." Wesley was ordained a deacon which was a precursor to service as a priest in the Church of England. Then he went to the American colony of Georgia to preach to the Native Americans. But nowhere along the way did Wesley feel he knew God. He returned to England believing he'd failed in his calling.

"I went to America to convert the Indians," he said, "but O my God, who will convert me?"

It was only when he went to a Bible study in Aldersgate that he felt his "heart strangely warmed" as the teacher expounded Paul's letter to the Romans. "I felt I did trust in Christ, Christ alone for salvation; and an assurance was given me that He had taken away my sins, even mine, and saved me from the law of sin and death," he said.

Wesley found what people of faith have known throughout spiritual history. We're right with God when we trust him to do his work in our lives--work we can't do on our own.

As Paul wrote to the Ephesians, "God saved you by his grace when you believed. And you can’t take credit for this; it is a gift from God. Salvation is not a reward for the good things we have done, so none of us can boast about it" (Ephesians 2: 8-9, NLT).

I Was In Prison

I traveled to a Tennessee prison last weekend to visit a cousin. My sister engineered our trip, and we picked up our cousin's brother en route and had a nice day, despite the major purpose of our excursion. I learned that other family members had been reluctant to go through the process of approval and to visit.

I remembered once hearing a radio host fielding a call from a lady who'd distanced herself from relatives who had a family member in jail.

"I don't want to be around them and I don't want my children around them," she said.

Surprisingly the host agreed.

"This inmate made a bad choice and you have to shield yourself from the family," she said. "I agree with you."

I was flabbergasted at this exchange, and honestly felt the host was out-of-line.

I was a regular Bible teacher at Bibb County Correctional Facility in Brent for a number of years when a long-time friend was named chaplain. I met Bob Hall in Brent; he was director of the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary's Birmingham extension. Bob recommended me to the North Georgia extension that sponsors a program in the Phillips Prison in Buford, Ga., and I've taught two classes there in recent years.  

All of that to say that most of the men I meet in prison are remorseful. They've missed so much in life that can never be replaced.  One inmate told me he was incarcerated when his son was 10, and his son had recently come to visit him on the boy's 18th birthday. Stanley was in tears when he said his foolishness made his son grow up without a father.

We mustn't forget that Jesus said, "I was in prison and you came to visit me" (Matthew 25:36). It's striking that for believers, serving those in prison is serving Christ.

My cousin is hopeful his release date will be in December. He's also anxious about what he'll do, where he'll live and how others will relate to him.

One mark of Christian grace is not only showing kindness to people in prison, but also showing kindness to former inmates. Jesus taught us to welcome those who messed up. In the story of the Prodigal Son the father received the disobedient son with joy, while the elder brother received him with disdain. I think we'd want to be more like the Father than the brother.

Some inmates will live with state-imposed restrictions the rest of their lives. Churches must respect these restrictions and sometimes put safeguards in place depending on the offense, but other than this, every church ought to be a place where prodigals can come and worship and feel safe.

God's Plans Are Good

It was a day of remembrance last week when I was invited to Marion Presbyterian Church to preside at Sam Colburn's funeral.

Sam was among the finest Christian men I've ever known and I was sad to learn of his malignancy. I'd planned to visit with him this month but his cancer was pronounced and moved more quickly than we'd thought.

It was Sam who invited me to speak at his church in 1998 when I became a faculty member at Judson College. He introduced himself to me at the new faculty reception and told me his pastor at Marion Presbyterian had left a few weeks before.

"Can you come Sunday and speak for us?" he asked.

I was surprised and reminded him I was a Baptist.

"That doesn't matter," he said. "We're all God's children."

So I accepted his invitation and spent nearly four years as what we'd call today an "undocumented" Presbyterian, or "stated supply" in Presbyterian-speak.

I remembered to the congregation last week how patient the church was with me. One Sunday I asked the worshippers to stand and greet one another--something we commonly do in Baptist churches. After services a sweet lady schooled me a bit. "Dr. Brooks," she said, "we're Presbyterians and we don't do that." I guess I made the folks nervous and they thought I was bringing out snakes next!

But the fine folks in Marion continued to support me as I labored among them.

Sam and Jack Snow were elders and I got to spend two hours every month with them. They prayed for me, for one another and for the church. The men took turns leading a Bible study and I grew as a Christian being in the presence of these special men.

After the church called a "real" Presbyterian I was invited to speak at Pine Flat Baptist Church in the Marion suburb of Suttle. I remember negotiating with the deacons about a little travel expense for the 13 mile trip, telling them I had walked to Marion Presbyterian.

"Michael," Roger Fuller said, "you can walk to Suttle. You just have to start earlier!"

We stayed at Pine Flat for 12 years before our move to Birmingham. At our farewell luncheon, the late Jean Watters said, "Michael, you spent 12 years here?"

"Yes, ma'am," I said.

"If you spend 12 years at the new place, you'll be about done!"

David wrote, "He fills my life with good things" (Psalm 103:5, NLT). God was good to Donna and me in our years in Perry County to give us two wonderful congregations who enriched our lives. He is, indeed, a God whose plans are good, and who specializes in serendipity.

We Must Pray For Our Leaders

It was in 1992 that I attended a Christian Citizenship Conference in our nation's capital. We had a prayer breakfast one morning superintended by the late Richard Halverson, at the time the chaplain of the U.S. Senate. The chaplain had invited two Southern Baptist senators to speak that morning: Trent Lott of Mississippi and Al Gore of Tennessee.

We couldn't have known at the time that Gov. Bill Clinton of Arkansas would tap Sen. Gore as his vice-presidential running mate later that year.

Chaplain Halverson read from Paul's first letter to Timothy: "I exhort therefore, that first of all, supplications, prayers, intercessions, and giving of thanks be made for all men; for kings and for all that are in authority . . ." (1Tim. 2:1-2).

Halverson said he was most often a guest in various churches on Sundays and rarely heard a prayer offered for the nation's leaders.

"One of the gravest failures of our American churches is our failure to obey the scripture and pray for our leaders," he said. "We sin against God when we don't pray for our president and other elected officials."

I took his word to heart and began to follow his counsel.

It's interesting that the leader when Paul wrote was Nero, one of the vilest men to ever rule Rome. Nero murdered his mother and is believed to have murdered two wives. He blamed Christians when Rome burned and he sponsored the first widespread persecution of the church. It is believed both Paul and Peter died at the hands of Nero.

Yet, Paul said to pray for Nero.

Some seniors helped me years ago when the Gulf War was beginning. At a fellowship lunch I asked them how they prayed during World War II. They said they prayed for their husbands and sons, to be sure, and for the war to end soon.

"What about Hitler?" I asked.

"Yes, we prayed for him that God would change his heart and stop his murderous intentions," they replied.

No matter who our leaders are, and whether they have our political support or not, we're exhorted to pray for them. We ask God's protection, wisdom and humbling grace.

I think Paul would expand his thoughts if he were writing today. He was a Roman citizen, but he had no right to vote. The Caesar was selected by family patronage and the army; then he chose other officials. But American Christians are entitled citizens who enjoy the most basic of civil rights--the right to vote.

Praying is forbidden in many places, but it's not forbidden in the polling place! Americans can and should be wrapped in the spirit of prayer whenever we go to vote.

On Walden Pond

It was in 2011 that the college sent me to a conference in Boston. On a free afternoon I rented a car and drove to Lexington and Concord--the birthplace of the American Revolution where shots were fired heard around the world. I'd not intended to go, but I saw a sign declaring Walden Pond at the next exit so I changed course. Philosopher Henry David Thoreau went to Walden in 1845 and spent two years pondering the meaning of life. Thoreau's cabin is gone, but the site remains a major tourist attraction.

Thoreau's most well-known words are, "Most men lead lives of quiet desperation, and go to the grave with the song still in them."

People today yet look for the song, but many look on dead-end streets.

According to the National Council on Alcoholism and Drug Dependence, one in 12 American adults has a serious alcohol problem. When you add drugs to the mix it brings the affected to one in 10. Alcohol and drugs promise an escape, but they've never solved anyone's problems. Most often they make problems worse.

A lady came to our church and asked me to pray for her son. She said she didn't know where he was at the time. "He's addicted and he stole from us, so we're practicing tough love," she said.

One of my boyhood heroes was Roy Rogers. He and his wife, Dale Evans, tragically lost three children. One was Sandy, whom they adopted after he was abused as a child. Sandy went to military school and loved it. He enrolled in the U.S. Army and was awarded the rank of private first class while in Germany. His buddies invited him out to celebrate and encouraged him "to drink like a man." Sandy drank himself into a coma and died early the next day.

Alcohol and drugs make promises they can't keep.

In contrast, Jesus said, "The thief comes to steal, kill and destroy, but I have come that they might have life and have it more abundantly" (John 10:10).

A preacher named Harry Monroe spoke at the Pacific Garden Mission in Chicago and said, "God can save any man in Chicago." Mel Trotter came forward and said, "That's not true. He can't save me. I'm no good." Trotter was plagued with guilt after the death of his two-year-old and because of his drinking and gambling. But God saved Trotter that night. Trotter then gave his life to the work of similar rescue missions. Though he died in 1940, the Mel Trotter Ministries in his native Michigan still ministers to people on the street and promises, "God can save anyone in Grand Rapids."

Mel Trotter found his song.

On Praising God

A former Nashville studio musician spoke to a group of church leaders in our city recently. He told us a little about his time in "Music City" and how decisions are made about what music to produce and sell. He said other than Bill Gaither's Homecoming music, the industry is producing only the so-called "praise and worship" music now. This music focuses on the majesty of God and is normally addressed to God the father or another member of the holy trinity.

I say "so-called" praise and worship since the church has been praising God for 2000 years. Praise and worship is nothing new. What we have now is the praise of God in a modern package. Praise is important. Praise to God is a significant part of worship. The Bible is clear that "we enter his gates with thanksgiving and his courts with praise" (Psalm 100:4).

But it's true that we don't enter the gate and stay there! As we mature and grow we appropriate more of God's plan for our lives and seek to obey him in our world.

A pastor mentor told me years ago that a service of Christian worship should begin with a hymn of praise to God the father, and then move to other themes such as salvation, devotion, commitment and service. I've always held up this model as the best in my worship planning.

Jesus told a story about two brothers whose father asked them to work in the field. One brother agreed, but didn't go. The second brother said "no," but then relented and went to work. Jesus asked which of the two obeyed their father. We know it was the initially-reluctant worker who went to the field who was obedient (Matthew 21: 28-31). This son is the model for Christian conduct in a world of need. We enter God's presence through praise, but then he commands us to get to work! There's much to be done in God's kingdom.

Robert Schuller before his death explained one reason he built a glass cathedral for worship. He said he wanted worshippers to look outside and see the world and realize they had a mission. "The church has hidden behind stained glass for too long," he insisted.

Other churches underscore the same thought with signs posted in their parking lot: "You're entering the mission field." Church members see these signs when they drive away from the worship place and understand everyone has a personal summons to serve.

Praise and worship isn't a substitute for service. But praise goes hand-in-glove with service. In fact, we may praise God best while we serve others in our world, exalting the name of the one who sent us.

God's Word Is Clear On Choosing A Mate

The Bible exhorts a believer not to marry outside the faith. This doesn't have anything to do with denominations--our Baptist daughter married a Presbyterian and is active with her husband in their church. But the prohibition does mean children of God are to marry other children of God.

Moses cautioned the Hebrews when they approached the Jordan that they weren't to enter the Promised Land and take Canaanite wives (Deuteronomy 7). The Canaanites were morally corrupt and worshipped false gods. In the view of ancient Israel, they were like a contagion that might infect God's people and make them spiritually sick; thus Israel needed to stay away from them. Two Hebrew leaders--Ahab and Samson--did marry Canaanites, and they failed miserably in their spiritual mission. The names of their wives are synonymous with evil: Jezebel and Delilah.

My eighth-grade teacher used to say, "The best thing in the world is a good girl, and the worst thing in the world is a bad girl." I always thought this was unique to her until I read Proverbs 5 and Proverbs 31. The latter chapter tells us about the godly woman whose husband and children rise up to bless her as a woman of virtue. However, the woman in Proverbs 5 is a cunning woman lying in wait for some unsuspecting man to ensnare and ruin. And it's true that these words aren't really gender-specific since men can be the culprit, too.

The New Testament is equally clear. The Apostle Paul wrote, "Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers" (2 Corinthians 6:14).

I've had many young people tell me their unbelieving fiancés promised to join them in church after they married, and have seen many of these promises die a slow death.

She was raised in a Baptist church and also attended a local Pentecostal church as a child. She began performing at age 11 in the junior gospel choir at New Hope Baptist Church in Newark, NJ. Her first solo performance was "Guide Me, O Thou Great Jehovah." As a teenager she attended Mt. Saint Dominic Academy, a Catholic school in Caldwell, NJ.

Whitney Houston had the voice of a generation. She sold millions of records and had a flourishing film career.

But Houston married a Canaanite. This woman, influenced by three Christian churches as a child, saw her life take a downturn. She died at age 48 after drowning in her bathtub. Toxicology found marijuana, Xanax, Flexeril, Benadryl and cocaine in her system. But the tragedy continued when her 22 year-old-daughter died earlier this year in a remarkably similar way: drowning with drugs in her system.

Not every case is this dramatic, but God's warning must be heeded.

Senior Saints

King Solomon as an older man gave a stern warning: "Remember now thy Creator in the days of thy youth, while the evil days come not, nor the years draw nigh, when thou shalt say, I have no pleasure in them" (Ecclesiastes 12:1).

Solomon was despondent. His body was weary and he carried the burden of a failed mission. He made poor decisions as a younger man that ruined his testimony later on. It seemed smart to marry into the families of other kings, thus ensuring peace, but the he allowed his perspective to change when he began to worship the pagan gods his wives brought along.

Gail Sheehy in "Passages" wrote about predictable crises, and getting older is one of them. The average lifespan in America is 79. According to the Social Security Administration, a man 65 today can expect to reach 84, and a women 65 today can expect to live to be 86.

The scripture insists old age is one of God's gifts. Solomon wrote in another place, "The glory of the young is their strength; the gray hair of experience is the splendor of the old."

Every day is a gift from God, and the accumulation of days, months and years is the cumulative gift of God. Therefore we should live as people of gratitude. The alternative is to become grumpy old men or fussy old women!

Victor Frankl spent time in several Nazi concentration camps where his wife, mother and brother died. He survived and wrote about his experiences in "Man's Search for Meaning." Frankl argued that everyone has freedom to choose their attitudes, and these attitudes determine our survivability and the caliber of our lives. "When we are no longer able to change a situation," he wrote, "we are challenged to change ourselves."

Seniors can determine to stay active and serve the Lord and his church. Some seniors hide behind the excuse, "I've served my time," thus denying themselves the fulfillment of helping in the Lord's work. Throughout my ministry I've been helped especially by a number of senior men whose counsel I sought regularly. The mistakes I made came in large measure when I didn't seek their advice.

John D. Rockefeller was a billionaire by age 53 when he succumbed to a mysterious disease. His body shriveled and his doctor said he had a year to live. Rockefeller met Christ and joined a Baptist church where he served as trustee, clerk, Sunday School teacher and sometimes custodian! He then determined to give away his fortune and gave more than one-half billion dollars before his death at age 97. Christ made a difference in his life, and seniors today can know this, too.

The Dangers of Mid-Life

Gail Sheehy in her 1974 best-seller "Passages" told of the predictable crises of life. One of those is mid-life, defined by "Psychology Today" as between the ages of 40 and 60. Elliot Jaques coined the phrase "mid-life crisis" in 1965 and we've commonly adopted his phrase as a descriptor of the aberrant behavior so many display.

The key stressors include aging parents and the death of parents, illnesses suggesting our own mortality, job issues and marital strife. Montgomery counselor Don Hill told of a mid-life counselee who came in and announced to his wife he'd quit his job and bought a farm. "A farm!" she exclaimed. "You've never been on a farm. What are you talking about?"

I suppose this was the plot for the old sitcom "Green Acres"!

David's sin with Bathsheba may be largely understood as a mid-life crisis. Nothing is said about his father or brothers, so David may've had no family support. Did he fear he was getting old? Was he like Alexander the Great who wept when there were no more challenges in life? Or was it the thrill of doing something daring and dangerous?

Whatever the case, he lusted after another man's wife and had relations with her. When she announced her pregnancy he was even more sinister. He summoned her husband from the war and tried to convince him to be father to the king's son. When Uriah failed to cooperate, the king sent him back to battle with a note to the general. Uriah carried his own death warrant.

God sent the prophet Nathan to confront David in his sin. To his credit, David immediately owned up to his wrong and begged God's forgiveness.

President Clinton visited Nelson Mandela in South Africa just after Clinton's impeachment. Mandela told him, "The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall."

Think about some well-known people who fell to rise again.

Charles Colson went to prison for his Watergate crimes, and left his heart there. He developed new compassion for inmates and founded Prison Fellowship to encourage them in prison and prevent recidivism after prison.

Jim Bakker ran a multi-million dollar TV network when he was sent to prison for six years. There he did the most menial of tasks: scrubbing toilets. But he rose and preaches on TV every day.

Pastor and writer Gordon McDonald failed in his marriage, but repented. His books such as "Rebuilding Your Broken World" have encouraged thousands.

The bad news is that you will stumble. You will fall. You will disappoint yourself and others.

The good news is that God is merciful. He will be your partner in rebuilding life.

On Being Gracious To Those Who Differ

I heard about a presumably wealthy Texas cattle ranch owner who boasted about his holdings. When asked how he got such a big ranch, he replied that he bought up a bunch of smaller ranches and made them into one bigger ranch. He said he kept the names and made the new ranch a composite of them all. Thus he owned the "Lazy J Rolling S Mighty Texas Bar Seven Triple L Buffalo Nickel" cattle ranch.

"Well, how many head of cattle do you own?" his friend asked.

"Only seven," he replied. "I had a lot more but most of 'em didn't survive the branding!"

I often remember this story as we approach football season and see how some fans take something that's supposed to be fun and turn it into a shouting match with friends and acquaintances. One friend told me they had an "Alabama/Auburn" night at their summer revival and it turned into a disaster! Apparently people focused on the red and orange more than they focused on repentance.

One pastor customarily cautioned people on the Sunday before the Iron Bowl to be kind to one another on the Sunday following. It would seem this would be unnecessary to say, but I've followed suit and usually say this myself come November.

This fall is fraught with another peril since it's election season. Candidates on both sides have said regrettable things, and some who support them have said some regrettable things, too. I just returned from a political items collectors convention where my conservatism was a target of some barbed comments, so I had to simply smile sweetly and press on.

I suppose the world will always be full of conflict, but it's very regrettable when this kind of division creeps into the church.

We lived in another county years ago. A local church, St. John's Baptist Church, got unwanted publicity when several public brawls broke out in the congregation and were reported in the local press. A new pastor came who chided his people somewhat sternly that if they were named for the Apostle John, the apostle of love, they must live like it.

John wrote, "We know that we have passed from death to life, because we love the brethren. He who does not love his brother abides in death" (1 John 3: 14).

And John recorded the lord of the church himself who said, "This is my commandment, that you love one another as I have loved you" (John 15: 12).

Everyone has their football favorites and a political party they support. This is America and we have freedom to do so. But let's remember we're Americans first. And Christians most of all.

Deliver Us From Evil

The 15th anniversary of 9/11 brought back many memories. All of us who remember that day recall where we were and how we heard about the attack. And our lives will be forever different.

When tragedy occurs, we see the worst of humanity and the best of humanity. Christians around the nation rushed to the stricken city to help. One of those was police chaplain Tim Storey of Alabaster who was part of a team sent to encourage fellow police officers some six months after 9/11.

Officer Storey showed some pictures at our church from his visit. One was from a fire station where 30 officers had been lost. Their comrades posted a memorial that read, "No farewell words were spoken, no time to say goodbye. You were gone before we knew it, and only God knows why."

The presence of evil is one of the great mysteries in scripture where we find a three-way tension between Satan and demons, the sovereignty of God and human will. The Bible affirms that Satan is the author of evil, to be sure. The comedian Flip Wilson made famous the phrase, "the devil made me do it," but I don't see any evidence that Satan forces us to choose evil. The truth may be that "I made me do it."

The second part of this equation is the toughest. Scripture affirms God is in control and holds all power in his hands. But why would God allow errant jetliners to crash into buildings? We don't know. The firefighter memorial is true, "only God knows why."

For some reason God allowed evil men the freedom to choose an evil course. One of my seminary teachers, the late Frank Stagg, suggested that one way to understand the wrath of God is his determination to let sin run its course. In other words, God steps aside and lets the full weight of our wrong decisions impact our lives and the lives of others.

Whatever the causes of evil, Christians have an obligation to roll up their sleeves and help others. To quote Flip Wilson again, he once identified his religion. "I'm a Jehovah's by-stander," he said! Jehovah has some by-standers, but they're living outside his will. God's people don't stand idly by. As Dr. Leo Eddleman of the New Orleans Baptist Theological Seminary noted years ago, the nearest pocket of need is a mission field, and the nearest Christian is a missionary.

We don’t know all the reasons 9/11 occurred, but we can celebrate the heroes of 9/11: a host of fire fighters and police officers and followers of Christ who unselfishly rushed in to help others in need.

Pastors, On The Whole, Enjoy Their Work

"The Aquila Report" published a story by David Briggs this month giving some interesting updates on the American pastor.

More than six in ten clergy members say they're very happy in their work, which is double the response of other American workers. It's sad that four in ten aren't fulfilled in their work, but sadder still that the majority of American workers aren't fulfilled. I can't say that I've ever had a job I hated, but it must be tough to get up every day and go to a place we don't want to go.

Ministers are being paid more, too. The study found that the "clergy wage disadvantage" in 1983 was $12 per hour; now it's about $9 per hour. This means ministers are paid less than comparable professionals but the gap has narrowed.

And in 1976, 61 percent of ministers lived in church-owned housing; now only 14 percent do. This is a welcomed trend since home-owning gives ministers some financial security and makes for longer tenure in their churches.

Another part of the study found that ministers are balancing work and family more effectively. An old study in 1934 found clergy worked 76 hours each week. By 1979 the average work week was 52 hours; now it's 43 hours per week.

I do remember with appreciation the tutelage I had from the late Dotson Nelson who was my field supervisor in my doctoral program. We had a time-study project and he remarked that a minister probably should work 60 hours each week in order to be effective. I've found his counsel accurate, though most ministers struggle at balancing work with family and vacation time.

Ministers wrestle with parts of their jobs, but on the whole, they'll grateful for the privilege of serving in vocational ministry. I remember an old movie about the life of Babe Ruth in which the character was surprised he could play baseball and be paid for it. I don't know if this is true, but ministers generally echo this attitude.

With Ministers Appreciation Month coming up in October, it's a good time to let your minister know your love for him or her.

Someone came up with a tongue-in-cheek list for those who want to get rid of their minister.

1. Pay him a living wage. He'll probably eat himself to death.

2. Pat him on the back and tell him what a good job he's doing. He'll work himself to death.

3. Tell him you're giving him a trip to Hawaii for his church anniversary. He'll probably have a heart attack.

4. Unite the church in prayer for him. He'll become so effective some large church will take him off your hands.

Scripts in our Heads

My daughter sent out an appeal. Her oldest son wanted to go to the Alabama Theatre and see "Jaws." I and my son volunteered, but not without my first expressing caution.

"He's only 10," I said. "Are you sure you want him to see this movie?"

"Yes," she said. "It might make him more cautious when we're at the beach!"

We enjoyed our guys outing, and I was impressed with the theatre. It had been many years since I attended something there, and its classic design and the "Mighty Wurlitzer" organ were wonderful. And it was fun seeing the old film on big screen again.

The trip reminded me of a woman I knew in north Alabama who said she hummed the Jaws theme when her children were on the beach since she wanted to caution them about getting too far away!

I suppose we all hear John Williams' classic movie theme and the bass fiddle in our mind when we think of sharks.

But that's not the only thing we hear in our minds. Research shows we store a lot of things there, including self-perception, or who we think ourselves to be.

I met Dr. John Howell a number of years ago and told him of my appreciation for a book he'd written on marriage. In the book he told about a counselee who grew up feeling worthless. In therapy she revealed her father's most-often spoken words to her were, "You're stupid." She grew up feeling that she was.

Whereas it's hard to imagine a father saying this kind of thing, it's true we all remember the words of others. Sometimes they used words of affirmation that made us feel better about ourselves, and sometimes they spoke thoughtless words that made us feel degraded.

Solomon wrote in Proverbs 18:21, "The tongue has the power of life and death." And the New Testament writer James insisted that just as a small rudder steers a large ship, so the tongue controls the course of our lives (James 3:4).

Followers of Christ must do all we can to avoid devaluing others with our words, and to use our words instead to add value to others. We see this when parents affirm children for their work. Their work may have been of little value, but the parent says, "Thank you for helping me! You're such a good helper!" This kind of affirmation makes the child feel valuable and needed, and gives incentive for him or her to try even harder.

We all have scripts in our heads that others put there. We can't do much about them, but we are in charge of the scripts we put in the minds of others.

On Seeking Truth

Some gremlins came to church last week. The projector didn't work and the soloist's microphone didn't work, either. Oh, my. I felt sympathy for the soloist since there but for the grace of God go I. Public speakers are, in large venues, almost entirely dependent on sound operators.

For many years Winston was our sound operator in a former church. He loved the Lord and was faithful, but he was almost deaf since he was a weaver in the Fairfax mill before hearing protection was required. Sometimes the system would squawk or squeal and I'd look back at Winston who just smiled back, unaware of what the rest of us heard.

I remember an episode of the Andy Griffith show in which Deputy Fife wanted to sing a solo in the town's spring production. Sheriff Taylor was able to turn off Barney's mike and have Gomer sing off-stage. Barney brought the house down with his wonderful solo!

I suppose one way to silence a speaker is to turn off the microphone. But there's another way.

Research demonstrates a phenomenon known as "confirmation bias." According to a Stanford University study this occurs when a person is confronted with facts proving a belief is wrong. Instead of changing their mind, a person can disregard the proof and harden their false belief. Thus confirmation bias has occurred. A similar study at Emory University found that a majority will give greater weight to a weak argument supporting their views than to a stronger argument refuting their views!

We did an exercise at Auburn many years ago, based on NASA training, that I've continued to use in classrooms ever since. The scenario supposes a crash on the moon, and survivors must salvage what supplies they can and make it back to the mother ship. Participants in the exercise number the items in order of importance and their responses are scored. Then participants are grouped and work on the exercise together. Without exception the group exercise is more accurate than the individual exercises.

The "moon walk" exercise demonstrates the value of group experience. Groups working together can make better decisions, more accurate decisions and foster ownership of an issue. Thus churches have committees or teams and industry has task groups for good reason. We do better work when we include others and learn from them.

The New Testament writer James exhorted his readers, "Understand this, my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to get angry" (James 1:19, NLT).

Wise people listen to one another and learn from one another. And when confronted with the facts, they change their mind and their actions to correspond with the truth.